Editing Procrastination

I’ve begun editing “Nor the Battle.” It amazes me how much things have changed since I last looked at the opening chapters, which was actually only about six or seven months ago. Sometimes I read a sentence and wonder how on earth I ever though it made sense.

Yesterday, while procrastinating, I got on Facebook and typed in “writer” for the Pieces of Flair keyword. I then proceeded to write down all my favorite quotes that popped up from that search. Just for giggles, I thought I’d share my list here. Enjoy!

–I write because I’d rather deal with people who don’t exist!
–Conform, go crazy, or become a writer.
–My characters write the story. I just try to keep up.
–If I stare at you, it’s not because you look good. It’s because you just helped me figure out how to off my villain.
–Writer’s Block: When friends and family decide you shouldn’t be screwing around on the computer.
–I’d love to, but I’m working on my novel.
–Sometimes I have to tell my characters “I’m sorry…this hurts me more than you…”
–Whether you like it or not, you’ll be in my novel. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
–Please do not annoy the writer. She may put you in a book and kill you.
–I wish I had writer’s block so I could actually sleep.
–“Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia.” ~E.L. Doctorow
–There is nothing more annoying to a writer than a pen without ink.
–Fiction writers think of six wore-case scenarios before breakfast, all involving death, mutilation, or global catastrophe.
–I’m a writer because real life is boring.
–Don’t get it right the first time, just get it written.
–“No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader.” ~Robert Frost
–Shhh…I’m working on my novel.
–I write, therefore I embrace insanity.
–You ever seen an author that’s SANE?
–There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
–Sometimes I have to remind myself that the characters I write about don’t actually exist.
–Can’t sleep. Must write.
–Plot. It builds character.
–I shall write a NOVEL and when it is deemed to be PUBLISHED thou shalt see me go SQUEEEE!
–Warning: Anything you say or do may end up in my next novel.
–I prefer to think of myself as “pre-published.”
–Do unto your characters the most deranged things humanly possible.
–If you could see my Google history, you’d think I was nuts…unless you’re a writer. Then you’d understand.
–I write to cope with life.
–I’m a writer. What’s your superpower?
–You don’t scare me. I write fiction.
–If you look at a crawlspace and think “Great place to hide a body”…you might be a writer.
–The pen is mightier than the sword. Never piss off a writer!
–Paper? Check. Pencil? Check. Idea? Ummm…
–If one wasn’t an author, one would be a really boring person filled with peculiar bits of trivia.
–“I write for the same reason I breathe, because if I didn’t I would die.” ~Isaac Asimov
–Leave me alone. I’m writing. *five hours later* Leave me alone! I’m writing!!! *stabs with pencil*
–Happily, we appear to have acheived coffee.
–The voices in my head won’t shut up until I write. The really annoying ones end up dead.
–Writer’s Block: When characters get fed up with all you put them through and go on strike.
–Freelance writer–will write for coffee.
–Because I’m the AUTHOR, that’s why!
–You’re going in my next novel.
–All hail the power of the pen!
–“Remember, writers are the only adults who get to spend all day in their pajamas playing with their imaginary friends.” ~Unknown
–Fuck off! I’m writing! Don’t fuck with a writer when they’re writing!
–I’m writing a book. A clever book. A scary book. A book that will be better than Twilight. And there’s nothing you can do to stop me.
–My characters hate it when I kill them.
–Writer. I.e. God of your own universe. Whee!
–Just keep authoring things or you will be eaten by flowers.
–You know you’re a writer when…you’ve thought all the flair quotes before you ever found them.
–Being a writer is great! Don’t like someone, eh, kill them off.
–There is no greater agony than bearing an unwritten story in you.
–Of course I live in my head…I’m a writer.

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